Sunday, November 30, 2008

gratitude

gratitude

noun
a feeling of thankfulness and appreciation


There is no better word for what I'm feeling this Thanksgiving weekend. "Gratitude" says it all. I have so much to be grateful for . . . my wonderful children, my terrific daughter-on-law, tremendously loyal friends, a job I enjoy and am good at, a home that is mine . . . and so much more. Sometimes it seems like life continuously throws curve balls my way, but through all of the adversity I learn to be a stronger person, with many of life's lessons under my belt. Though it isn't a smooth road, it is an adventurous one, and for that I'm also grateful. What would life be like if there weren't ups and downs along the way?

Being a strong person (read that as you may - stubborn? headstrong?) I've put myself into some situations that others might find too risky. I changed jobs this year when it would have been much safer to stay where I was, both financially and regarding longevity. I tend to speak out when others choose not to, especially when staying quiet means condoning the status quo or even wrong-doing --- often putting myself in the line of fire from those I rile. I've been known to question authority, though generally it is in seeking clarification. While it can sometimes be seemingly principled, I face the consequences accordingly. I also know that what I've chosen to do is what I've got to do for me. And I am grateful that in every questionable situation I've learned a lot about myself, while being supported and appreciated by those who may benefit from my actions (yet sometimes only in the long run). There is always a desired (or hoped for) effect in mind . . . I don't put myself out there just for jollies, that's for sure. I'm grateful that I have the fortitude to do what is right for me.

There have been some life decisions that I've made that certainly could have turned out much worse than they did. And yet, there is always a silver lining --- new friends made and old bonds strengthened, students who needed what I could provide at that instant, closer relationships with my own children. As is often the case in life, hindsight is always clearer. I can usually see a less-fraught path after the fact. But would I have been as open to the end results, the lesson I needed to learn at that time? Probably not (see above: headstrong). So I am also grateful for the (seemingly) bad decisions, that don't end up being so bad after all.

More than anything, I am grateful for the love I have in my life. I am surrounded by those who love me, and I am one lucky chick!! I have the world's greatest close friends, the best daughter and sons I could possibly deserve, former students whose lives I've touched (and whose lives have touched mine in return), extended family-friends from a lifetime ago, friends from all of life's stops, and my ridiculously fat cat, who always loves me at the end of the day! I have really worked on loving my life, loving myself, and making the best of every day --- and these people help me to appreciate it more and more.

I am truly blessed . . . and eternally grateful.